:::jUst mE:::

arrrgh!

2005-12-10T21:16:00.000+08:00

what the ****?!

nice timing.

now?

why push yourself now?

now that i don't need you.

now that i don't care about you.

now that i don't give a damn about what you do.

now that i don't give a damn about what you say.

hahaha.

your just making things complicated.

will you just stop.

after all that you did.

nah.

no chance.

stay away from me.

i don't need someone like you.

a liar.

a useless person.

and oh...

the great pretender!

isn't it obvious?

your text messages,

your offline messages,

you friendster messages

i don't answer it.

don't you get it?

no matter what you do.

no matter what you say.

things won't change.

what you did will never be forgotten.

what you said will never be forgiven.

that's just the way it is.

you just can't have everything you want.

and sorry...

we can't be friends anymore.

and just to let you know...

your not worth being a friend.

and your not even worth trusting.

after all those stupid things you did.

after all those stupid things you said.

after making other people believe...

believe that im a bad person.

nice try.

now look...

you're here...

begging.

hey quit it!

things have been done.

and what you did was wrong.

now you tell me that you've changed?

what made you think i care?

duh?!

you can change any way you want.

but it just won't change things.

you said that many times before...

that you've changed.

making me believe every word you say.

words that mean nothing.

words that were said to impress.

hey.

i think you have a problem there.

but i dont care.

then now...

now you tell me you've realized what you've done.

now you tell me you've realized what you've lost.

damn it!

what do you want me to do?

reflect on you realizations?!

hahaha.

you should be thankful.

thankful that there are still people...

people who trust and believe in you.

but i ain't just one of them.

and i will never be...

again...

one of them.

so...

just quit it!

its useless.

you won't be able to convince me...

to convince me that you're a 'good' person now.

and that you've learned your mistakes.

and that you're ready to pay for what you did.

blah. blah. blah.

just stop talking.

stop bothering me.

and just to clear things out.

it ends here.

and that's it.

true meaning of LOVE

2005-12-02T23:01:00.000+08:00

if its because of her eyes or her lips or her great body,
its not love...
its lust.
if its because of her intelligence or insight about life,
its not love...
its admiration.
if its because she cries everytime you try to leave,
its not love...
its pity.
if its because she makes you forget to study and sleep,
its not love...
its infatuation.

LOVE is when you don't know why you seem to be attracted to a person.

love has its reason.
and that reason is unknown.

last item

2005-12-02T22:57:00.000+08:00

"love is like the last item on display. you have to hold it and think really hard if you really want to have it or just leave it there, otherwise, you might regret seeing someone take that last piece you gave up..."

when a guy...

2005-12-02T22:51:00.000+08:00

when a guy loves you...
he'll bring out your natural best!

when a guy loves you...
he'll be proud of you even at your worst!

when a guy loves you...
he'll say that your pretty even at your ugliest!

when a guy loves you...
he'll never leave you especially at your weakest!

when a guy loves you...
he'll never get even tired of caressing you!

when a guy loves you...
he'll come back to you after you reject him!

coz no matter how cruel the situation would be...

if a guy really loves you...
he'll make a way even how hard it could be!

saD tH!ng

2005-12-02T22:48:00.000+08:00

tHe saD tH!ng abOut l!fe !s wHen yOu mEet sOmeOne wHo mEans a lOt tO yOu onLy tO f!nd oUt !n tHe enD tHat !t waS nEver bOund tO bE anD wE jUst hAve tO lEt gO... :(

tO LeaRn

2005-12-02T22:45:00.000+08:00

yOu'LL leaRn tO l!ke sOmeOne wHen yOu f!nd oUt wHat maKes hEr LaugH.
bUt yOu cAn nEver tRuLy lOve sOmeOne unt!L yOu f!nd oUt wHat maKes hEr cRy.

10:54:06 p.m. - 11/24/05

2005-12-02T22:43:00.000+08:00

quiet

lonely

weak

confused

crazy

this is me...

without you...

10:42:31 p.m. - 11/24/05

2005-12-02T22:37:00.000+08:00

waking up each day makes me happy
knowing that i'll still have the chance to talk to you,
the chance to see you,
the chance to be with you,
the chance to make you feel how much you mean to me.
but i hope,
in each day that come my way,
i'd be able to let you know what i really feel;
how much i'm missing you...
how much i love you...

10:10:04 p.m. - 11/24/05

2005-12-02T22:35:00.000+08:00

tell me what is it that you want.
tell me what is it that your feeling.
tell me what is it that makes you act and say things differently.
tell me why.
tell me how.
tell me now so that i may tell you
that what you feel is just exactly what i feel for you.

2:15:43 a.m. (yesterday)

2005-11-09T10:23:00.000+08:00

in life

you meet people

be friends with them

and eventually

you get close to them

and they become close to you.

you talk,

share stories,

hang out.

you get use to them

being there...

ALWAYS.

but why

when we thought things are going well

and that thing will never change

that's when they suddenly go

that's when they suddenly leave you hanging

without any reason?

you don't know why

you don't know what

you don't know how

it feels bad

it makes you think

it makes you confused

but no matter what you do

you can't change it

you can't make them stay

you can't make them say and do

the things that both of you were once having

you can't make things happen the same way they were before

well,

that's what makes life complicated...

having to deal with people

having to deal with situations

like these...

sad...

but...

true.

bLaH ... bLaH ... bLaH ...

2005-11-09T10:19:00.000+08:00

11 - 04 - 2005
(a text message)

"im someone who owes you a part of my life, where i am right now, and how im doing..i owe you a lot of apologies and i long for your friendship.. :,( im so sorry.."

** hahaha. i was asking you who you are and how'd you get my number but this is what you tell me. nice try. i dont care about all these shit. and oh, about that friendship? im sorry but there wont be any chance that you'll have me as your friend. duh?! we have been more than friends for 2 years and 3 months but look waht you did?! then now you tell me you want us to be friends?! hahaha. stop fooling around. how can i be friends with someone who played me and made me look stupid?! how can i trust you as a friend if you wasn't even worthy of the trust i gave you then when we were more than friends?! now tell me...

- ! tR!eD -

2005-11-09T10:02:00.000+08:00

! tR!eD tO f!gHT !t, bUt !t wAs tOo sTrOng...
tR!eD tO fOrgEt !t, bUt !t wAs aLways tHeRe...
tR!eD tO stOp !t, bUt !t bEcaMe fuLL-bLOwn...
nOw ! hAve nO cHo!ce bUT tO aDm!t !t...
!ve faLLen heLpLessLy !n lOve w!tH yOu.

- cOnfess!Ons -

2005-11-09T09:54:00.000+08:00

!ts nOt eXactLy tHe wAy yOu sm!Le...
!ts nOt eXactLy tHe wAy yOu spEak...
aLtHOugH ! knOw tHeRe's sOmetH!ng vEry spEc!aL tO !t...
!ts nOt eXactLy tHe wAy yOu lOok...
!ts nOt eXactLy tHe wAy yOu aCt...
altHOugH ! knOw !m veRy fOnd Of !t...
! rEaLLy dOnt knOw eXactLy wHat !t !s !n yOu tHat maKes mE wAnt tO aLways bE w!tH yOu,
bUt ! dO knOw eXactLy hOw ! fEeL: I .....

Love

2005-11-09T09:51:00.000+08:00

"Love has its time, season and own reason! You can't ask it to stay. You can only embrace it as it comes and be glad for a moment in your life it was yours."

- mY Own gOod cOmbO -

2005-11-09T09:48:00.000+08:00

"aLL !m LoOk!ng fOr...mY Own gOod cOmbO. sOmeOne ! cAn bR!ng Out tHe bEst !n anD sOmeOne tHat bR!ngs Out tHe bEst !n mE."

d' pErfEct mAn

2005-11-09T09:44:00.000+08:00

"You can't have a realationship with a man you've never laid eyes on."

"Love is friendship on fire."

"Every day hold potential for beauty."

rEacH, eXpOse, lOve

2005-11-09T09:38:00.000+08:00

tO rEacH fOr anOtHer !s tO r!sk !nvOLvemEnt. tO eXpOse yOur feeL!ngs !s tO eXpOse yOur tRuE seLf. tO lOve !s tO r!sk nOt tO bE lOvEd !n rEtuRn.

s!ngLe

2005-11-09T09:35:00.000+08:00

!ts tOugH tO sTay s!ngLe wHen evErybOdy eXpects yOu tO bE w!tH sOmebOdy. wHat tHey fa!L tO rEaL!ze !s tHat sTay!ng s!ngLe !s nOt abOut hav!ng nO cHo!ce bUt aN OppOrtun!ty tO maKe smArt cHo!ces.

teaRs

2005-11-09T09:34:00.000+08:00

rEaL teaRs aRe nOt tHosE tHat faLL frOm tHe eyEs anD cOver tHe fAce bUt aRe tHosE tHat faLL frOm tHe hEart anD cOver tHe sOuL.

a wOman...

2005-11-09T09:28:00.000+08:00

The Hebrew Talmud says: "Be very careful if you make a woman cry because God counts her tears. The woman came out of a man's ribs, not from his feet to be walked on. Not from his head to be superior to, but from the side to be equal with. Under the arms to be protected, and next to the heart to be loved."

- g!rL !nteRruptEd

2005-11-09T09:23:00.000+08:00

"Have you ever confused a dream with a life? Or stole on something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe i was just crazy... Maybe it was the 60's... Or maybe i was just a girl... INTERRUPTED!"

!'d ratHer

2005-11-09T09:19:00.000+08:00

"! wOuLd ratHer dO sOMetH!ng anD f!nd Out tHat !t waS tHe wrOng tH!ng, tHan nEver knOw !f !t waS tHe r!gHt tH!ng."

love & relationship. ---> my answers.

2005-11-04T17:09:00.000+08:00

1.are you in a relationship right now? why/whynot?
+ nope. e wla po e.

2. how do you love?
+ unconditionally.

3. ideal love?
+ something real.

4.do you believe in love at first sight?
+ hmmm. d mxdo.

5. do you believe in forever?
+ yups yups.

6. describe your worst self when inlove?
+ i dunno. ano nga ba???

7. do you want to be inlove right now? why/whynot?
+ hala. ano bang klaseng tanong yan.

8. do you give up easily or do you wait?
+ i dont give up easily and i dont just wait for thing to happen. i stay strong and as much as possible i make things happen.

9. do you want your partner to beyour alterego or more like you?
+ i dunno. as long as we're both ok with each other then that's fine. ;)

10. have you ever been inlove with a moodyperson?
+ inlove? nah. not yet. sorry. ;)

11. when in a relationship, do you oftensay iloveyou?
+ if ever ill be in a relationship, no. i dunno. for me, its better to say it and hear it once in a while knowing that what you say and what you hear is true and sincere. and it makes it sweeter, hndi nakakasawa.

12. are you vocal about your feelings?
+ yups yups. ako pa. pranka po e.

13. if your partner wants to let go of you without a reason, will you pull back or stay?
+ if ever i'm in a relationship and this happens, i'd pull back. why stay if the other doesn't want you to. that person aint worth your time and effort. and especially, your love.

14. have you ever been let go by a person at thetime when you really, really love him/her na?
+ never had a relationship nga e. ankulit.

15. for you, what is love?
+ for me, "love is when we give anything we can just for that person to be happy. It is when we do everything we can just for that person to feel his/her worth. It is when we do things that we don't usually do as a person even though it means sacrificing. It is when we don't care about all those material things in life that that person can offer us. It is when we still remain with that person even though things get crazy and rough between the both of us. It is when we know when and how to set that person free."

16. have you ever been hurt by a person you lovebut that person doesnt know he/she is the reasonwhy you're hurt?
+ by someone i love? friends and family included? if yes. yups yups. by friends and family.

17. have you ever fallen for a friend?
+ as in nahulog? wahahahaha. kiddin'. the answer is nope.

18. how was it for you?
+ how was what???

19. do you easily fall?
+ fall? inlove? nope.

20. how will that person knowif you're falling na?
+ i dunno. he'll just know.

21. do you physically hurt your partner?
+ if ever i'm in a relationship, i won't do that.

22. when in a relationship, do you and your partner often fight?
+ waaahhh. aba malay. never had a relationship nga e db. ankulit tlga.

23. are you mushy?
+ hmmm. i dunno.

24. do you like a partner who's mushy?
+ un tama lng.

25. are you stiff or do you easily melt?
+ huh? labo a. anyway, d nmn po ako manhid at d rin nmn po ako sobrng sensitive. tama lng.

26. what makes you melt? why?
+ still dunno.

27. lastly, if God can't interfere with your free willand you can choose any person you want to bewith in a relationship, who would it be?
+ who? i dunno. but i'd choose to be with the right person for me.

ang gulo lng.

2005-10-28T08:49:00.000+08:00

bakit ganun?

bakit may taong ganun?

mabait...

nagaalala...

nandyan pagkelangan mo...

pero bakit?

para saan?

ganun lang ba tlga?

o may ibang dahilan?

dahilan na d maintindihan.

dahilan na sana maging malinaw.

ano ba tlga?

ang gulo-gulo.

kung ano man yun...

yung dahilan na un...

sana malaman ko...

sana maintindihan ko...

pwede paki paliwanag naman.

paki paliwanag lang bakit ganun...

bakit ginagawa un...

ano ba tlga?

wag na pahulaan pa...

sabihin na lang...

nang hndi na maging magulo

at para maging malinaw...

LAHAT.

***wRitten: OctOber 26, 2005

2:05:23 a.m.

2005-10-20T08:59:00.000+08:00

i woke up early this morning.

can't sleep.

i dont know why.

maybe i was just thinkin'.

thinkin' about things.

then this came up.

"there are times

when people enter our life

for some reason.

what?

why?

i dont know.

some stay.

some come and go.

but whatever that reason is

it just makes me wonder

it just made me confused.

why of all the people,

those who leave,

are those who we wish would stay?"

LoneLy

2005-10-18T11:36:00.000+08:00

what's this i'm feelin'?
i don't understand.
i can't explain it.
is it because of the things happening around me?
or is it becuase of some people...
some people whom i can't understand...
whom i can't explain?
i really don’t know.
well…
i guess life really is a mystery.
there are stuffs that we can’t explain…
stuffs that we can’t understand.
no matter what we do…
no matter how hard we try…
it just aint that simple.

when a girl...

2005-10-14T15:43:00.000+08:00

When a GIRL is quiet, millions of things are running through her mind.

When a GIRL is not arguing, she is thinking deeply

When a GIRL looks at u with eyes full of questions, she iswondering how long you will be around.

When a GIRL answers "i'm fine" after a few seconds, she is not at all fine.

When a GIRL stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying.

When a GIRL lays on your chest, she is wishing for you to be hers forever.

When a GIRL wants to see you everyday, she wants to be pampered.

When a GIRL says I love you, she means it.

When a GIRL says "i miss you," no one in this world can miss you more than that.

d' pErfEct mAn

2005-10-08T19:06:00.000+08:00

"The perfect man can be anywhere in the world...but he chooses to be with her because...life is better with her by his side."

d8

2005-10-08T19:04:00.000+08:00

The best date is with someone who can take you anywhere without touching anything but your heart.

yOu knOw...

2005-10-08T19:02:00.000+08:00

"yOu knOw yOu'Re !nlOve wHen yOu cAn't faLL asLeEp bEcaUse rEaL!ty !s f!naLLy bEtter tHan yOur drEams."

- Dr. sEusS

L!fe

2005-10-08T18:54:00.000+08:00

"some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. delicious ambiguity...

- gilda radner

"the aim of life is to live, and to live means to be aware joyously, drunkenly, serenely, divinely aware"

- henry miller

- wEdd!ng pLanNer

2005-10-08T18:48:00.000+08:00

"Love isn't like some enchanted evening...isn't a fairy tale...or even love at first sight. that isn't real life."

- maHatma gandH!

2005-10-08T18:47:00.000+08:00

"LeArn aS !f yOu wEre gO!ng tO l!ve fOrevEr. L!ve aS !f yOu wEre gO!ng tO d!e tOmOrrOw."

dReams... dEatH...

2005-10-08T18:42:00.000+08:00

sOme drEams aRe bEst unspOken...

deatH dOesn't pUt aN enD tO lOve.

maG

2005-10-08T18:37:00.000+08:00

"wHat kEeps yOu lOok!ng anD fEeL!ng gOrgeOus anD v!taL !s tHe knOwLedge anD weLL-bE!ng tHat cOmes frOm befR!end!ng yOur oWn bOdy"

- h!tcH

2005-10-08T18:33:00.000+08:00

"yOu cAn't rEaLLy knOw wHeRe yOur gO!ng unt!L yOu knOw wHeRe yOu'vE bEen."

- h!tcH

2005-10-08T18:29:00.000+08:00

"nEver L!e, stEaL, cHeat Or dR!nk. bUt !f yOu mUst L!e, L!e !n tHe aRms Of tHe One yOu lOve. !f yOu mUst stEaL, stEaL aWay frOm baD cOmpaNy. !f yOu mUst cHeat, cHeat dEatH. anD !f yOu mUst dR!nk, dR!nk !n tHe mOments tHat taKe yOur bReatH aWay."

- cOacH cArteR

2005-10-08T18:17:00.000+08:00

"oUr dEepEst fEar !s nOt tHat wE aRe !nadEquate. oUr dEepEst fEar !s tHat wE aRe pOwErfuL bEyOnd mEasuRe. !t !s oUr l!gHt, nOt oUr daRkneSs tHat mOst fR!gHtens uS. yOur pLay!ng smaLL dOes nOt sErve tHe wOrLd. tHere !s nOtH!ng enL!gHtenEd abOut sHr!nk!ng sO tHat otHer peOpLe wOn't fEeL !nsEcuRe arOund yOu. wE weRe aLL maDe tO sH!ne, aS cH!Ldren dO. !ts nOt jUst !n sOme Of uS, !ts !n evEryOne. anD aS wE Let oUr oWn L!gHt sH!ne, wE uNcOnsc!OusLy g!ve otHer peOpLe pErm!ss!On tO dO tHe saMe. aS wE aRe L!beRated frOm oUr oWn fEar, oUr pResEnce aUtOmat!caLLy L!beRates otHers."

k!sS

2005-10-08T18:14:00.000+08:00

"a k!sS !s a lOveLy tR!ck dEs!gnEd bY natuRe tO stOp spEecH wHen wOrdS bEcOme sUperfluOus..."

L!fe

2005-10-08T18:12:00.000+08:00

"L!fe !s nOt abOut tHe nUmbEr Of bReatHs tHat yOu taKe bUt tHe nUmbEr Of mOmentS tHat taKe yOur bReatH aWay..."

dAmn!

2005-10-05T14:38:00.000+08:00

heLp!

! rEaLLy dOn't knOw wHat tO dO.

tH!ngs aRe gEtt!ng cRazy.

st!LL gOt a lOt tO dO

bUt tHere a!nt enOugH t!me.

!ts dR!v!ng mE cRazy.

!ts dR!v!ng mE !nsAne.

!ts maK!ng mE fEeL uSeLesS.

!ts maK!ng mE fEeL heLpLesS.

wHat sHouLd ! dO?

wHeRe sHouLd ! stArt?

wHy !s tH!s haPpen!ng?

tO wHom shOuLd ! tUrn tO?

teLL mE hOw.

teLL mE nOw.

cOz tHere a!nt enOugH t!me.

!'m lOos!ng cOntrOl.

"pErfEct"

2005-10-05T14:30:00.000+08:00

tHe pErfEct mAn

hE mAy nOt bE aS !n L!teRaLLy pErfEct

bUt sOmehOw

sOmewHeRe

sOmeOne

!s Out tHere

fOr yOu

yOu'vE gOt tO beL!eve

yOu'vE gOt tO bE Open

cOz fOr evEryOne Of uS

tHere rEaLLy !s a pErfEct mAn.

***wRitten: sEptEmbeR 30, 2005

vOw fOr my bUtteRfLy

2005-09-21T10:47:00.000+08:00

in your eyes i see the light

shinning every dark split of my life

my heart was moved with your innocent smile

continuously beating and touching the deepest of my soul

a beautiful thing you've offered to me

not until...now

i have never valued the hands of destiny

be it on the low or high above the skies...

i will be there,

your tears i will dry

i never want to see you cry...

i love you, my friend

i will never ever say goodbye...

a person so gentle, so pure as a child

the campanion and sister i have longed to have.

as you spread your wings now...

and experience the roses

the essence of our amity

it will never change

i will stay the same

and assure you of a friendship

bound in eternity and devotion

be it on the low or high above the sky...

i will be there,

your tears i will dry

i never want to see you cry...

i love you, my friend

i will never ever say goodbye...

**tH!s !s a sOng cOmpOsEd bY mY fR!enDs (opeL & pAnk!ks) fOr oUr fR!end. tHe tHrEe Of uS sAng !t On hEr dEbut. !t waS a sUrpR!se. :D

anG LabO nat!nG laHat!

2005-08-21T16:24:00.000+08:00

ANG LABO N'YO MEN

If u smile at `em, they think pa cute ka...
If u don't naman, sasabihan kang suplada...
If u respond to his love agad, they think you’re easy to get...
If it took u years to decide, sobra kang pa hard to get...
If u go out with him alone, sasabihan kang liberated...
Kapag may chaperon along, bad trip k'se madidisturb...
If u go out with another guy, tingin sa `yo playgirl...
Pag stick ka sa kanya, they'll proclaim your dead na dead...
If u ask him where he's been, sasabihan kang over protective...
Pag pinabayaan mo naman, they think you’re fooling lang...
If u let him kiss yah, he thinks you’re cheap...
If u refuse naman, he'll go find another chick...

Girls are just humans and make mistakes too, and we often wonder, ba't ANG LABO N'YO MEN?!

ANG LABO N'YO DIN!

If we smile at u, u'll think crush namin kayo...
If u don't naman, sasabihan kang feeling gwapo...
If u respond to her crush agad, they think your taking advantage...
If it took u years to notice, sobra kang manhid at torpe...
If u go out with her alone, sasabihan kang boring...
Kapag may barkada along, bad trip k'se barkada pa rin...
If u go out with another gal, tingin sa `yo playboy...
Pag stick ka sa kanya, they'll proclaim your dead na dead...
If u ask her where she's been, sasabihan kang possessive...
Pag pinabayaan mo naman, they think you’re fooling lang...
If u kiss her, she thinks your going too fast...
If u don't naman, she'll say u'r unromantic...

Boys are just humans and make mistakes too, and we often wonder, ba't AND LABO N'YO DIN?!

THE QUESTIONS"
If you see me walking the road with someone else, it's not because I like his company, it's because you're not brave enough to walk beside me.
If you hear me talking about him all the time, it's not because he pleases me, it's because you're too deaf to hear my heartbeat.
If you feel me falling with someone new, it's not because I love him, it’s because you're not there to catch me fall.If you feel lost, I too am nowhere. I too don't know where the road is going.

Are we gonna cross each other's path or just completely turn around? Will we just let go of what we had or go to the place where love is bound?

Don't let me walk with him. It's you I want to walk with.
Don't let me talk of him. It's you I want to talk with.
Don't let me fall for him. It's you I want to fall in love with.

THE ANSWER"
When you thought I wasn't brave enough to walk beside you, I was behind you every step of the way...still filled with awe because of the beauty that stands before me.
When you thought I was too deaf to hear your heartbeat, I didn't want to assume anything and I was afraid to lose our friendship.
When you thought I wasn't there to catch you it was because you never gave me the chance, you never reached the bottom, you've already grabbed the branch.
If you feel like you are nowhere, I too am lost. I too don't know where the road is going.

Are we just going to turn around or are we gonna cross each other's path? Will we just let go of what we had or go to the place where love is bound?

Don't let me walk alone. I want to walk by your side.
Don't let me talk of something else. It's you I want to talk with.
Don't let me fall for someone else. It's you I want to fall in love with.

be!nG s!ngLe mEans yOu aRe frEe tO lOve aga!n

2005-08-21T15:57:00.000+08:00

All your life, you had specific dreams about what
your family life would be like when you finally married.

You were so intent on what you wanted, you even
made a list of qualities and characteristics you were
looking for in a spouse, in a home, in your job, in
your children.

But time passed, and that person you were so
intent on didn't come along.

All of your friends married, had children, had
beautiful homes.

And still you were single. You prayed and prayed
and prayed for that person to come along, but nothing
happened.

You had a good job. You served in your church.

You spent daily time with the Lord in prayer and
studying the Word.

You dedicated your life to serving God in every
way possible, but still nothing.

So you decided to take matters into your own
hands, and you began an active search for a mate.

And within a short period, you met someone who
almost fit the bill.

Almost.

Sure, there were a few things Missing, a few rusty
spots in that person's character.

But, after all, no one is perfect.

Maybe your goals were too high. Maybe you'd been
asking for the impossible.

Maybe this was the person God wanted for you so
your character could grow through dealing with his or her
failings.

Even though it often seems that God is slow to
answer prayers, no matter whether it's about a
mate, or a job, or our children, or our finances, or
anything else, we have to remember that God
doesn't wear a watch.

Nor does He look at our human calendars. He sees
with eternal eyes.

He operates on an eternal timetable, according to
His plan and His schedule.

If God seems to be running late, don't get impatient
and run ahead of him.

Wait for the Lord's timing in everything.

To the single folks out there, this is for you.

Single means you have the time to grow and be the
person you want to be.

Single gives you space to grow.

Sometimes, it is harder to grow when you are too
close to someone.

Trees are planted far apart so they can spread their
branches and become strong as they mature.

Single means learning to live by yourself.

However, that is no more difficult than learning to
live with somebody else.

Single means freedom.

You are free to spend a week's vacation on the
beach, to take computer courses, to work late on
an interesting project, to spend the day in bed
with a good book or simply with a person who has
read one.

Single means learning not to need a man/woman to
make your life meaningful but learning to live with
a man/woman because you want to be with
him/her.

Single means that sometimes you will wonder why
you will bite your lip and feel wistful and wonder if
marriage is better.

Ironically, yet quite happily, single is feeling
good about being in control of your life.

It is liking and respecting who you are and why you
are.

Single is realizing that being married is not
necessarily better, it is merely different.

Single means that there could be something
wonderful around the corner and you can take advantage of
it.

Being single means you are free to love again.

hAve yOu evEr...

2005-08-21T15:51:00.000+08:00

Have you ever loved someone and they had absolutely no idea whatsoever? Or fell for your best friend in the entire world, and then sat around and watched him/her fall for someone else?

Have you ever denied your feelings for someone because your fear of rejection was too hard to handle? We tell lies when we are afraid...afraid of what we don't know, afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out about us. But every time we tell a lie...the things we fear grow stronger.

Have you ever noticed that the worst way to miss someone is when they are right beside you and yet you can never have them...when the moment you can't feel them under your fingertips you miss them?

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most; saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing and wishing you had? I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say. Don't be afraid to tell someone you love them. If you do, they might break your heart ... but if you don't, you might break theirs.

Have you ever decided not to become a couple because you were so afraid of losing what you already had with that person? Your heart decides who it likes and who it doesn't. You can't tell your heart what to do. It does it on its own...when you least suspect it, or even when you don't want it to.

Have you ever wanted to love someone with everything you had, but that other person was too afraid to let you? Too many of us stay walled because we are too afraid to care too much...for fear that the other person does not care as much, or that Life is all about risks and it requires you to jump. Don't be a person who has to look back and wonder what they would have, or could have had.

No one waits forever...

PrOm n!gHt: 02/13/02

2005-08-10T08:45:00.001+08:00

tHese pOems weRe maDe anD g!ven tO mE bY sOmeOne...

! rEmemBereD hOw !t staRteD
It waS a s!mpLe caLL
aT f!rSt ! waS fR!gHteneD
cOz ! tHougHt ! wOuLd faLL

yOu anSweReD tHe pRayEr ! waS caLL!ng
nOw !'m nO lOngEr aLonE
!n haPp!neSs ! waS sHout!ng
at LaSt, my aNgeL haS sHown

! wAnt tO Let yOu feeL yOuR spEc!aL
eVen !n a s!mpLe wAy
nOt bY g!v!ng cAsH Or mEdaL
bUt bY pRom!s!ng tO staY

yOu lOok wOndeRfuL tOn!gHt
anD !'m pRouD tO bE w!tH yOu
! fEeL sO veRy l!gHt
cOz !'m w!tH a bEaut!fuL g!rL l!Ke yOu

sO ! wAnt tO knOw yOu beTTeR
! w!sH tHat ! cOuLd taLk
! dOn't wAnt tH!s n!gHt tO bE b!tteR
sO caN wE gO Out fOr a waLk?

! wAnt a s!mpLe cOnveRsat!On
Let's taLk abOut yOu anD mE
! hOpe !t wOn't caUse yOu !rr!tat!On
bE!ng w!tH yOu wOuLd caUse mE sO mUch gLee

eVerytH!ng maY nOt matteR
bUt haV!ng yOu w!LL maKe mE gLad
mY L!fe's gO!ng tO a betteR
at Last, !'m nO lOngeR saD

Let's sHaRe abOut L!fe's uPs anD dOwNs
bY taLk!nG tO eacH otHeR
Let's sHaRe abOut L!fe's tHoRns anD cRowns
bY keEp!ng OurseLvEs tOgetHer

hOw ! w!sH tH!s n!gHt wOuLdn't enD
! w!sH eVerytH!nG !s fOreVer
hOw ! w!sH tO bE w!tH yOu 't!LL tHe enD
! w!sH yOu'd LeaVe mE nEveR

befOre, ! d!dn't eXpeCt tO bE w!tH yOu
bUt nOw !'m heRe, sHar!ng tH!s n!gHt w!tH yOu
befOre, ! tHougHt yOu'd maKe mE fEeL bLuE
bUt nOw !'m haPpy, tHat's wHy ! wAnt tO tHank yOu...

yOu wOuLd wOndeR
wHy ! aCt L!ke tH!s
tHeRe aRe tH!ngs !n mYseLf ! pOndeR
bUt tO yOu ! dOn't sAy

! lOve yOu tHat !s wHy
!n tHe pRev!Ous dAys ! feLt sHy
! enD aLL dAys w!tH a saD s!gH
! tH1nK Of mYseLf aS a stUp!d gUy

nOw yOu knOw wHat !t's aLL abOut
! rEaLLy hOpe yOu'd unDeRstanD
jUst spEak tO mE anD dOn't sHout
!f tHe pa!n yOu cAn't w!tHstanD

sOrRy, ! d!dn't teLL yOu frOm tHe bEg!nn!ng,
wHat ! rEaLLy fEeL
! d!d !t w!thOut tH!nk!ng
bUt wHat's w!tH!n mE !s rEaL

! tH!nk tH!s !s tHe "pErfect" t!me
tO eXpLa!n wHat's gO!ng On
!t waS haRd fOr mE tO bE a m!me
tHat d!dn't taLk 't!L yOu'Re gOne

!'m sOrRy !f ! d!d !t qu!ckLy
w!tHout eVen Lett!ng yOu knOw
! wAnt yOu tO knOw tHat !'m sOrRy
bUt !t'LL bE haRd fOr mE tO Let yOu gO

! dOn't caRe !g tHeRe's a cOnsequEnce
Or anYtH!ng eLse tHeRe cOuLd bE
dOn't m!nd !f ! sHout !n tHe m!ddLe Of s!Lence
"I LOVE YOU", tHat's wHat ! wAnt tHem tO sEe

!f yOu wAnt mE tO wa!t, !'LL dO
nO matteR wHat haPpenS !'LL stay
! wOuLd dO anytH!ng jUst fOr yOU
jUst tO maKe yOu haPpy !n anYwaY

yOu wOuLd tH!nk !'m ObsEsseD
bUt ! tH!nk yOu'Re wRong
w!tH yOu ! fEeL bLesseD
yOu'Re mOre bEaut!fuL tHan a sOng

! knOw lOv!n mE tOo !s nOt s!mpLe,
afteR aLL wHat ! d!d
bUt bEcaUse Of yOu mY hEaRt beCame ampLe
yOu'Re tHe anSweR tO mY cReEd

! tH!nk oF yOU aS mY "ANGEL"
tHat gu!Des mE !n mY wAy
! cAn't beL!evE tO mY aNgeL ! feLL
bUt st!LL "I LOVE YOU" tHat's wHat !'d sAy

wHy & wHen !s LOVE tHe gReateSt Of tHem aLL?

2005-08-01T23:06:00.000+08:00

Love is the greatest of them all because its mystery is pure and absolute. Love is unconditional. We set qualifications for the right person to love but we know, at the back of our minds, that the person we truly love will always be an exception. We accept the other whole heartedly no matter who and what he/she is. It is because despite all the difficulties and trials that we’ve gone through, after all the pains, the efforts, and the changes, we still don’t ask and expect for anything in return, we still continue to love, and just love. I read a short definition of love by Middleton that could explain why love is the greatest, and with this I agree:
Love is all in fire, and yet is ever freezing;
Love is much in winning, yet is more in leesing;
Love is ever sick, and yet is never dying;
Love is ever true, and yet is ever lying;
Love does doat in liking, and is mad in loathing;
Love indeed is anything, yet indeed is nothing.
Love is the greatest of them all when we try and do our best for that one person we truly love and cherish. It is when we try to be perfect but still not be for that person. It is when we become considerate but do not tolerate the other. It is when we become good but not too nice to that person. It is when we become consistent but not persistent. It is when we give anything we can just for that person to be happy. It is when we do everything we can just for that person to feel his/her worth. It is when we do things that we don’t usually do as a person even though it means sacrificing. It is when we don’t care about all those material things in life that that person can offer us. It is when we still remain with that person even though things get crazy and rough between the both of us. It is when we know when and how to set that person free.

tH!s wAs wHat ! unDerstOoD...

2005-08-01T22:54:00.000+08:00

Love is patient. Love is effortful. We use our energy, we try and attempt to do something, despite its difficulties, and still remain patient for our beloved.

Love is kind. We act lovingly despite the fact that we don’t feel loving. We consider and care for our beloved and not only for ourselves. We become gentle and sensitive to what the person is feeling.

Love is not jealous. We should not be suspicious and watchful to our loved one. Because if so, it prevents spiritual growth for both of us. There must be freedom. There must be an exemption from an obligation to the other. With this, comes trust. If we trust the person then we wouldn’t be jealous of that person’s works and affiliations with others.

Love is not snobbish. When we love, it requires participation of our entire being. We do not consider the other to be inferior. We give our attention, we listen and we make efforts for the other.

Love is never rude. In loving, we should bring comfort and convenience. We must consider separateness from the other. We perceive our beloved as someone who has totally separate identity.

Love is not self-seeking. It is not dependent of the other. There is true acceptance of your own and each other’s individuality and separateness. There is leadership. We lead and guide our partner to spiritual growth.

Love is not prone to anger. It isn’t uneasy and troubled over injuries. When there is love, there is self-discipline. We manage our own feelings. We know the right time when, where, how and to whom to show what we feel.

Love does not rejoice in what is wrong but rejoices with the truth. Even though things are complicated, because of the trials that may come, when we love we do not dwell and blame our partner for their faults and wrong doings but instead, we try to understand and see the truth behind those actions and accept it.

There is no limit to love’s forbearance, to its trust, its hope, and its power to endure. When love starts to become bitter and we still tolerate and bear its pains it doesn’t mean that we are being a martyr and that we chose to suffer. It was discussed earlier that Love is patient and kind. When things start to become crazy and rough between the one we love, no matter what happens, whatever the cause is, we still have faith and belief in that person, we still desire and expect for the best for the both of us and we still hold on and never give up. This is what love is all about. Love is a form of work and courage. It is ready to take the risk of loss.

Love never fails. It is a circular process. It is too large and too deep to be fully understood or measured or limited within the framework of words that we tend to associate almost every happy and longing feeling with it. Love is said to never fail because it is a permanently self-enlarging experience that when we love and experience love, we learn to extend ourselves for the nurturing of the other and our own spiritual growth.

When the perfect comes the imperfect will pass away. We must learn to take the risk of commitment. We should not be afraid to take chances even if it might get us hurt, just be strong and take it because we might slip that single chance that would change our lives and make us really happy.

tHe saDdeSt tH!ng.

2005-07-25T23:37:00.000+08:00

i believe the saddest thing in life is caring so much for someone and then one day you look into their eyes and listen to them talk and realize that they're gone. All you can see infront of you is a stranger with just a known name...

a saCr!f!ce.

2005-07-25T23:32:00.000+08:00

Loving is a sacrifice. You forgive and try to forget, you know you'll cry but you'll still give it a try. You're hurt but you still love. you were betrayed but you still hope. You were left behind but still... you wait... :(

=(

2005-07-25T23:28:00.000+08:00

At some point in your life... you'll meet wonderful people... so wonderful that you'd fall for them and think that they feel the same way too... but the truth is... they're just nice... too nice...

qUeSt!On.

2005-07-25T23:21:00.000+08:00

lOve !s aN eaSy wOrd tO sAy
bE!ng lOveD !s fLatteR!ng
lOv!ng sOmeOne !s sCaRy
lOv!ng sOmeOne tHat lOves yOu baCk !s rOmant!c
bUt sOmetH!ng st!LL bOtHers mE...
!f LOVE !s a gOod tH!ng,
wHy aRe pEopLe cRy!ng?

...

2005-07-25T23:14:00.000+08:00

maGmaHaL?
oO, naGawa kO nA,
maGmaKaawa?
oO, naSubUkan kO nA,
um!yaK?
oO, !LanG bEsEs nA,
sUmukO?
h!nd! pA...
bAt akO sUsukO
kUng h!nd! naMan dApat?
bAt akO sUsukO
kUng kaYa kO pA?

nO rEgrEts...

2005-07-25T23:08:00.000+08:00

pEopLe faLL !n lOve w!tHout knOw!ng wHy Or hOw... !ts a vEry sPec!aL fEeL!ng tHat dOesn't rEqu!re aNy aNswEr. yOu jUst lOve nO matteR hOw stUp!d yOu bEcOme... nO rEgrEts...

gOne!

2005-07-25T23:04:00.000+08:00

tHe !mpOrtanCe sOmetH!ng !s sEen wHen !ts dOne...
tHe wOrtH Of sOmeOne !s rEaL!zeD wHen tHe!r gOne...
fOr !t'LL aLwayS bE a mySteRy
tHat wE rEaL!ze tHe eSsEncE
wHen !ts aLreaDy a mEmOry...

a mEsSage fOr mE...frOm sOmeOne...

2005-07-25T23:01:00.000+08:00

" yOu'LL nEveR knOw wHo yOu'LL mEet, yOu jUst knOw tHat yOu mEet hEr w!tH a rEasOn. tHe rEasOn tHat bOtH Of yOu w!LL OnLy f!nd w!tH eacH otHer. tHat's tHe bEaUty Of l!v!ng... hAv!ng tO mEet sOmeOne L!ke yOu. "

***juLy 18, 2005

yOur cHo!ce.

2005-07-25T22:47:00.000+08:00

!f yOu lOve sOmeOne, nEveR aSk aNy op!n!On frOm otHers bEcaUse !t m!gHt gEt wrOng... jUst fOLLOw yOur hEart! fOr !ts bEtteR tO faLL frOm yOur oWn haPp!neSs, tHan tO faLL frOm aNyOnes aDv!ce!

wHen ! LOVE...

2005-07-25T20:25:00.000+08:00

wHen ! lOve sOmeOne, ! lOve aT mY bEst. !'d g!ve anytH!ng ! cOuLd. !'d dO eveRytH!ng ! cOuLd. !'d dO tH!ngs tHat a g!rL wOuLdn't dO fOr a gUy, evEn tHOugH !t mEans saCr!f!c!ng a lOt anD evEn fOrgEtt!ng mYseLf. ! dOn't caRe abOut h!s mOney anD aLL tHOse matRr!aL tH!ngs tHAt hE cOuLd g!ve mE. nO One cOuLd evEr lOve sOMeOne aS mucH aS ! dO Or evEn cLOse. bUt ! dOn't uNdeRstanD... wHy !s !t tHat ! g!ve sO mucH anD rEce!ve nOtH!ng? ! wOndeR, w!LL tHeRe cOme a t!me tHat !'d hAve sOmeOne tO lOve mE mOre tHan ! cOuLd oFFer?

jUst fOr tOday :)

2005-07-21T22:09:00.000+08:00

CANCER

Thursday, July 21, 2005

A sexy Full Moon could inspire a reinvigorated partnership. Look to make the most of what you have. That which appeared to have recently fizzled out might suddenly howl with energy under tonight's Moon.

sOmetH!ng gReat.

2005-07-20T17:46:00.000+08:00

"gOd nEveR lEavEs yOu eMpty. hE aLwAys rEpLaces evErytH!ng yOu lOst. !f hE aSks yOu tO pUt sOMetH!ng dOwn, !ts bEcaUse hE waNrs yOu tO p!Ck Up sOmetH!ng gReat!"

...

2005-07-15T00:54:00.000+08:00

wHat yOu jUst rEad waS a mEsSage sEnt tO mE bY mY stUp!d eX! ! rEaLLy dOn't knOw wHy hE tOLd mE aLL tHOse tH!ngs knOw!ng tHat hE's cOurt!ng aGa!n tH!s g!rL tHat hE mEt duR!ng h!s sUmmeR cLass...

stUp!D tH!ng!

2005-07-15T00:09:00.000+08:00

From:
d' aSshOLe

Date:
localDateTimewithTimezone("June 28, 2005 6:32 PM","timetag1");
Tuesday, June 28, 2005 6:32:00 PM

Subject:
baby.. :(

Message:
baby pee..txt me nmn..db best friends tau..d ba dpat mgpancnan tau? :( haaaaaayy..namimis prin kta.. :( niwei,lam mo nmn cgro n nililigawan ko ulit c angel..sana nmn ok lng sau un..kc ok nmn sa knia lahat..oo niloko k xa dati pero naintindihan nmn nia and natanggap nia ung mga un e..baby pee...baby prin kita and babalik talaga ko.. :( sana lang payagan mo pa ko.. :( basata ung mga promises ko sau bago tau mghiwalay gngawa ko talaga..ngbabago na ko..d lang para sau o kay angel kundi para sakin din....baby pee..sorry..wag n sana sumama loob mo sakin o magalit pa..gusto ko mgkaibigan talaga tau..magbestfriends..pls? :( un lang..sana mgreply ka..ingat ka lagi ha..__ forever..miz u..kng may tym ka reply ka nmn..

fEeDbaCks On mE.

2005-07-09T02:17:00.000+08:00

* person you can rely on
* simple
* sporty
* friendly
* makulit
* model-like figure
* looks snobbish at first
* nice
* funny
* looks tough and mataray at first
* brave
* strong-hearted
* feisty woman
* masungit
* true friend
* can be the toughest woman on earth but a great, great friend
* super kulit
* sarap kasama!
* nakakaloka!
* changed person
* tough!
* dependable
* walang katapusang tawanana!!!
* BAIT!
* maraming tanong about non-sense stuff
* masayahin
* very reliable
* straightforward
* angelic but naughty
* may trademark na mataray
* palaban pero nasa lugar
* madaldal
* matakaw
* trustworthy
* mataray
* suplada
* tactless
* seryoso
* parang hindi makakasundo
* leader
* cheerful
* feminine

***jUne 30, 2005

' f!nD!ng sOmeOne '

2005-07-09T02:03:00.001+08:00

fOr mE...

! beL!ve tHat...

" h!nD! nat!n daPat h!naHanap yUng taOng gUsto naT!n maHaL!n aT h!nD! tayO daPat nagHaHanap nG taOng maGmamaHaL sA aT!n; magH!ntay LaNg tayO aT hayAan LaNg naT!n nA s!La aNg dUmaT!ng sA buHay naT!n paRa at LeaSt h!nD! naT!n s!s!s!H!n saR!L! naT!n paGh!nD! nag!nG maAyOs aNg laHat... "

***watcHa tH!nk?!

fate...

2005-07-09T01:57:00.000+08:00

"tHe faTe Of lOve !s tHat !t !s aLways tOo L!ttLe... Or tOo mucH... dOn't L!ve yOur L!fe w!tH sOmeOne yOu waNt tO l!ve w!th; L!ve !t w!tH sOmeOne yOu caN't L!ve w!tHOut!"

- aT f!rst s!gHt

2005-07-05T00:28:00.000+08:00

"yOu w!LL sEe a Lot Of tH!ngs, bUt tHey w!LL mEan nOtH!ng tO yOu !f yOu lOse s!gHt Of tHe tH!ng yOu lOve."

- tHe maSk Of zOrRo

2005-07-05T00:24:00.000+08:00

"tHe onLy wRong tH!ng wOuLd bE tO dEny wHat yOur hEart tRuLy fEeLs..."

- bEacHes

2005-07-05T00:20:00.000+08:00

yOu've gOt tO w!n a L!ttLe,
lOse a L!ttLe
aNd aLways haVe tHe bLues
jUst a L!ttLe,
tHat's tHe stOry Of,
tHat's tHe gLory Of love.

- gOod w!LL hUnt!nG

2005-07-04T23:57:00.000+08:00

"tHe onLy fEeL!ng Of rEaL lOst !s wHen yOu lOve sOMeOne mOre tHan yOu lOve yOurseLf."

- fOrget paR!s

2005-07-04T23:33:00.000+08:00

wHen yOu lOve sOMeOne,
aNd yOu lOve tHem w!tH yOur heaRt,
!t neVer d!sappEars
wHen yOu'Re apaRt.
aNd wHen yOu lOve sOMeOne
aNd yOu'vE dOne aLL yOu caN dO,
yOu sEt tHem fRee,
aNd !f tHat lOve waS tRue...
wHen yOu lOve sOmeOne
!t w!LL aLL cOme baCk tO yOu.

'KaRma!'

2005-07-04T22:13:00.000+08:00

weRen’t yOu tHe One wHo sa!D tHat yOu dOn’t want mE aNymOre
aNd hOw yOu nEeD tHe space, aNd g!ve tHe kEys baCh tO yA dOor
aNd hOw ! cR!eD aNd tR!eD aNd tR!eD tO make yOu sTay w!tH mE
aNd st!LL yOu sa!D tHe lOve tHe wAs gOne aNd tHat ! haD tO lEave
nOw yOu
talk!n’ bOut fam!LY,
nOw yOu
sAy!n’ ! cOpLete yA dReam
nOw yOu
sAy!n’ !’m yA eveRytH!nG
yOu’Re cOnfus!n mE wHat yA sAy!n’ tO mE
dOn’t pLay w!t mE dOn’t pLay w!t mE

! rEmemBa wHen ! waS s!tt!n’ hOme aLOne wa!t!n’ fOr yOu t!L 3 o’cLOck !n tHe mOrn
aNd wHen yOu caMe hOme yOu’d aLwayS haVe sOme sOrRy eXcusE
aNd tHen eXpLa!n !t ta mE L!ke !’m jUst sOme k!nD Of fOoL
! sacR!f!ceD tHe tH!ngs ! wAnt tO jUst tO dO tH!ngs fOr yOu
aNd wHen !t’s t!me tO dO fOr mE
yA neVer cOme tHrOugH
nOw yOu
waNna bE Up unDa mE hEeey
nOw yOu
haVe sO much ta saY tO mE hEeey
nOw yOu
waNna make t!me fOr mEee
watcHa dO!n’ tam E
yA cOnfus!n mE
dOn’t pLay w!t mE dOn’t pLay w!t mE

! rEmemBa wHen ! waS s!tt!n’ hOme aLOne wa!t!n’ fOr yOu t!L 3 o’cLOck !n tHe mOrn
n!gHt aFter n!gHt know!n’ sOmetH!n’ gO!n’ On
waSn’t lOng bEfOre ! bE gaWa gaWa gOne
lOrd knOw !t waSn’t e-Za beL!evE mEy nEva tHOugHt yOu’d bE tHe oNe ta
dEc!eve mEy
yA neVa dO wHat yA sUppOseD tO dO
nO nEed tO approach mE bOo cause !’m Ova yOU

cause wHat gOes aROunD cOMes aROund
wHat gOes Up mUst cOme dOwn
nOw wHo’s cRy!n’ dEs!r!n’ tO cOme back tO mE

cause wHat gOes aROunD cOMes aROund
wHat gOes Up mUst cOme dOwn
nOw wHo’s cRy!n’ dEs!r!n’ tO cOme back tO mE

gOtta stop tRy!n’ tO cOme back ta mE

!t’s called KARMA baby aNd !t cOMes aROund

st!LL aN aSshOLe!

2005-06-24T19:19:00.000+08:00

June 23, 2005

08:20 p.m.

aSshOLe: Baby pee...Ask ko lang...Would there be a chance that we could be together again?

mE: --- NO REPLY!

11:20 p.m.

aSshOLe: Baby pee...Please answer my question...Anyway...I want us, if its possible, that we'll be best of friends talaga...You know...Lookin' at eachother's back...Basta i want us to still be open to each other...You're still my baby and i hope i'm still your baby too...Basta i'll be back...It might not be now but i will come back...i'll make myself almost perfect first...Let's both change...Ok? I miss you na my baby pee...You take care always...Keep in touch...

mE: ---NO REPLY!

***FUCK YOU ASSHOLE! I HATE YOU! And there's no chance that we would be together again! I don't want to get hurt and be played again! I don't want you, AN ASSHOLE, to be in my life again! My life now is perfect and i am happy and contented with what and with who i have! QUIT PLAYING GAMES WITH ME! If you think you could make me fall again with your stupid lies...I WON'T!!! You just got no bitch to turn too that's why your back, bugging me...but hey...FUCK I DON'T WANT YOU BACK!

aSshOLe!

2005-06-24T18:26:00.000+08:00

He's back! My ex is back! He keeps on bugging me and i don't know what he wants! Its just so irritating!

Last Sunday night, he sent me a message: " Baby pee...Happy father's day to your dad...Sorry if i'm not able to text you coz i don't have load...Just keep in touch, ok? I miss you na po...take care! :) "

***What was that all about?! " baby pee " ?!?!?!?!?! And i don't care if you miss me...you can die missing me but i won't give a damn about it!

After reading his message i just replied just to ask him when will he pay me coz i need the money ASAP coz i need to buy my books for school.
Then last Wednesday night, he texted me just to tell me that he would want to make us an account in friendster. He said: " Baby pee...i'll make us an account in friendster coz i wanted to make one before pa, ok? i'll just text you if i made one na..."

***WHAT THE HELL IS HIS PROBLEM?! Why would he make us an account?! What for?!

NO! I told him i don't want to. I asked him why won't he just make an account for him and his girlfriend (if there is).

***ASSHOLE!!!!! Why bother making one?! We ain't togeteher anymore and were not even close because of all those thing he did to me.

cOnt!nuat!On...

2005-06-22T07:57:00.000+08:00

...the following days he still made me call him. He calls me using another cell in the middle of the night and asks me to call him back. When i try to make an excuse not to call him he tells me that 'sayang naman daw yung pagtawag nya sakin' just to tell me to call him. So i did...i called him. As soon as he answered my call he asked me why didn't i call him that day and tells me that he's been waiting for my call the whole day. I told him that i had many things to do but he still insisted that i should have done something to tell him that i couldn't call.

***Are you my boyfriend to make me do things and oblige me to call you and text you always?! Please stop pretending to be my bf! It just makes me hate you more!

Anyway, i still didn't call him the following days. He texted me and asked me why i didn't call but i didn't answer. Then just last Saturday morning, he thought that maybe i had no load that's why i wasn't replying to his messages so he told me to call him at home. Good thing a was in school that time so i had all the reason not to call him. So i didn't call him. Then that afternoon, he sent me a message and it goes like this: 'hoy kung ayaw mo sa akin sabihin mo hindi yung titntaguan mo ako. puta. parepareho lang kayong mga babae, mga walang kwenta!'...

***Peeps, you know this. We were together when he sent me this message and you read it.

But i still didn't answer. I don't care what the hell he wants. And in the first place, he was the first one who left me hangin' then now he wants to come back and be my boyfriend?! HELL NO!!!

Since then, he stopped sending me messages and calling me. And thank God its over. No more sleepless nights...

x's: Peeps, thanks for your help. And just so to let you guys know, i'll always be here for y'all. You guys know that. Peaceout.

pEeps...heLp mE On tH!s...

2005-06-15T09:27:00.000+08:00

One week after me and my ex broke up there was this guy who got my number and started sending me messages. We both got to know each other for almost a week. Then...bigla siya nawala...i don't know what happened but he just left me hangin'...its not that i have any feelings for him but it just made me think why would he do that.

*** Well, it wasn't a lost for me coz i don't even know him that well and i still haven't seen him.

Then, just last Saturday, he asked me to call him so i did. (coz we're friends...somehow) We talked and i asked him what happened but he just said that he couldn't tell me things and that he's confused. (confused of what?) then he started telling me stories about what happened between him and his ex and how they broke up. After telling his side, he asked me if i've got a bf so i said no coz that's the truth. He asked me why and i just answered him that its not that easy to just pick a guy and make him your bf. I'm not that kind of girl. I don't just talk to a guy then meet him and just with a short period of time make him my bf. Its so not me. Anyway, goin' back to my story, after askin' those questions he asked me stuffs about myself. So i answered everything, honestly. Then he just stopped, and then asked me, "am i ok?", "what do you mean?" i asked him coz i didn't understand what was he tryin' to say. Then he said, "isn't it that you don't have a bf? can i be your bf?" ...

*** WHAAAAAATTTTT?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! Just like that?! After leavin' me hangin' then now you come back and ask me if you could be my bf?! What the hell is wrong with you?! i just told you that i'm not that kind of girl!

Anyway, i told him that what he want is impossible coz it ain't that easy. And i think he got frustrated hearing that so we just ended our conversation. Then just this mornin', 12:03 a.m., he made me call him again and so i did. he asked me why didn't i call him again the following day and yesterday.

*** What would i say?! Why should i call him?! I didn't even know that he wanted me to call him back anytime.

He told me that i should call him anytime, everyday. I told him i'm busy coz i'm already goin' to school but he insisted that i can still call him even though i'm in school. he told me to call him when i wake up, during my break and after school.

*** DAMN! Are you my bf?! Why should i do that?!

So i just said yes even though i don't want to. Well, he can't do anything nmn if i won't call him eh. hehehe. Then he started to become nice to me and somewhat sweet. But that was nothing and it didn't mean anything to me.

So there...

I just don't know how to tell this guy that he should not waste his time on me coz all the things he'll be doing will be for nothing. Its just that why would i still want a guy or even give him a chance when he once left me hangin' without any reason at all. And i just don't like him. He smokes, he loves getting drunk and he's just not my type of guy. I don't want his attitude. So here's the thing...how will i tell him that he should just stop what he's doin' coz it'll be all for nothing? As in NO CHANCE at all...

Please help me on this...just leave me you comments on what should i do...

thanks...peace out y'all...mwah...

tHe b!tcH !s baCk!

2005-06-09T09:53:00.000+08:00

Hey, hey, hey...its me again...just want to share something...

Just the other night, my ex’s ex-girlfriend bitch, who happened to be his other girlfriend during our last three months together, sent me a message askin’ if I was the one who wrote those comments in her blog...hahaha...sorry but she was wrong...it wasn’t me but it was part of me...hehehe...(I won’t tell you how) well, our conversation went on, I asked her if she was the famous fuckin’ bitch j______ and she said I got that right...hahaha...she just admitted that she was a famous fuckin’ bitch...anyway, I asked her if she fucked a lot...and damn she was so proud that she did...and guess who was her fuckin’ partner...my ex...she said they fucked a lot while me and my man were still together...hahaha...why does she think I care...why tell me that now, now that I don’t give a damn about what they do coz I don’t give a fuck about people who fuck their way in life...

She continued to send me messages that she was prettier, smarter and all those kind of stuffs...man, she really prepared for her speech huh...hehehe...she said that my ex left me coz I’m this and that (I won’t tell you what those are but she was insulting me)...but when I asked her if she knows me or anything about me she said she doesn’t...so how can she say things like that about me if she doesn’t...its just coz my ex told her those stuffs about me which is not true...well, I told her I don’t care about it coz I’m happier now that he’s out of my life...and damn it feels good...it feels so good without havin’ an asshole in my life...i just thought that both of them would be better together coz they get along well and have a lot of interests in common...and that is coz both of them are fucking free fuck fuckers (just like what my friend said...you know who you are)...hahaha...

She kept on telling me that it wasn’t her fault that my ex left me...so, now its my fault?! Fuck you bitch! Do you think it wasn’t her fault if I told you that she was the one who asked my ex if they could get back together even if she knew that I was still his girlfriend then? Nice try bitch! If you didn’t ask him that he wouldn’t have to make such a decision. Well, what can I say, your just a kid and I’m so sorry about you being used by guys just to have sex with you, which you really loved doin’. Just like what you said bitch, you were born to love but not to be loved. Yeh that’s right...guys like you coz of what they can get from you but they don’t like you coz they love you...too sad...well, that makes me luckier than you coz even if I’m not as pretty or as smart as you are, like what you’ve said, I can say that yes I’m born to love and also to be loved...people accept me for who and what I am not just coz they want something from me and that’s what makes my life better than yours...

X’s: don’t worry I’ll pray for you bitch... :)

tO aLL tHose cH!cks oUt tHere.

2005-06-08T09:57:00.000+08:00

"cH!cks L!ke uS aRe tHe qUeEns anD pR!ncEssEs !n tH!s dAmn wOrLd, nO fReak!n' pLayEr sHouLd cEase oUr sm!Les sO dOn't sHed a tEar baBy, cOz we'LL mAke sH!t bOys cRy..."

d' nOtebOok

2005-06-08T09:43:00.000+08:00

" ! aM nOtH!ng spEc!aL; Of tH!s ! aM sUre. ! aM a cOmmOn g!rL w!tH cOmmOn tHougHts, anD !'vE leD a cOmmOn L!fe. tHere aRe nO mOnumEnts dEd!cateD tO mE anD mY nAme w!LL sOon bE fOrgOtten, bUt !'vE lOved anOtHer w!tH aLL mY hEart anD sOuL, anD tO mE, tH!s haS aLwaYs been enOugH."

wHat hUrts

2005-06-08T09:33:00.000+08:00

"!t hUrts tO bE rEjeCteD bY sOmeOne yOu L!ke bUt beL!evE mE...!t hUrts 10 t!meS mOre tO bE tUrneD dOwn bY sOmeOne wHo OncE swOre unDy!nG lOve fOr yOu..."

nOw...

2005-06-08T09:26:00.000+08:00

sEe ! dOn’t knOw wHy
! L!keD yOu sO much
! gAve yOu aLL Of mY tRust
! tOLd yOu ! LovEd yOu
bUt tHat’s nOw dOwn tHe dRa!n
yOu pUt mE tHrOugH pa!n
! waNna lEt yOu know tHat ! fEeL

fUck wHat I sa!D !t dOn’t mEan sH!t nOw
fUck tHe pResEnts m!gHt aS well tHrOw ‘eM Out
fUck aLL tHosE k!ssEs !t d!dn’t mEan jAck
fUck yOU yOU hOe
! dOn’t wAnt yOu r!gHt bAck!!!

fUck wHat I sa!D !t dOn’t mEan sH!t nOw
fUck tHe pResEnts m!gHt aS well tHrOw ‘eM Out
fUck aLL tHosE k!ssEs !t d!dn’t mEan jAck
fUck yOU yOU hOe
! dOn’t wAnt yOu r!gHt bAck!!!

yOu tHougHt yOu cOuLd
kEep tH!s sH!t fRom mE
yOu burnt b!tcH ! hEarD tHe stOry
yOu pLayEd mE
yOu eVen gAve heR hEaD
nOw yOur aSk!n’ fOr mE bAck
yOur jUst another haG
LoOk eLsewHere
cOz yOur dOne w!tH mE

fUck wHat I sa!D !t dOn’t mEan sH!t nOw
fUck tHe pResEnts m!gHt aS well tHrOw ‘eM Out
fUck aLL tHosE k!ssEs !t d!dn’t mEan jAck
fUck yOU yOU hOe
! dOn’t wAnt yOu r!gHt bAck!!!

fUck wHat I sa!D !t dOn’t mEan sH!t nOw
fUck tHe pResEnts m!gHt aS well tHrOw ‘eM Out
fUck aLL tHosE k!ssEs !t d!dn’t mEan jAck
fUck yOU yOU hOe
! dOn’t wAnt yOu r!gHt bAck!!!

yOu qUest!OneD d!d ! cAre
yOu cOuLd asK aNyOne
! eVen sa!D yOu weRe mY gReat One
nOw !ts Over
bUt ! dO aDm!t !’m saD
!t hUrts rEaL baD
! cAn’t swEat tHat
cOz ! LovEd a hOe

fUck wHat I sa!D !t dOn’t mEan sH!t nOw
fUck tHe pResEnts m!gHt aS well tHrOw ‘eM Out
fUck aLL tHosE k!ssEs !t d!dn’t mEan jAck
fUck yOU yOU hOe
! dOn’t wAnt yOu r!gHt bAck!!!

*** cOz yOur jUst L!ke One Of tHem b!tcHes... (a gUy tHougH)...

befOre...

2005-06-01T16:12:00.000+08:00

sOme peOpLe l!ve fOr tHe fOrtunE
sOme peOpLe l!ve jUst fOr tHe fAme
sOme peOpLe l!ve fOr tHe pOweR
sOme peOpLe l!ve jUst tO pLay tHe gAme
sOme peOpLe tH!nk tHat tHe pHys!caL tHinGs dEf!ne wHat’s w!tH!n
anD ! bEt tHat bEfOre tHat l!fe’s adOre aRe fuLL Of tHe sUpeRf!cIaL

sOme peOpLe wAnt !t aLL
bUt ! dOn’t wAnt nOtH!nG at aLL
!f !t a!n’t yOu baby, !f ! a!n’t gOt yOu baby
sOme peOpLe wAnt d!amOnd r!nGs
sOme jUst wAnt eVeRytH!ng
bUt eVeRytH!ng mEans nOtH!ng !f ! a!n’t gOt yOu

sOme peOpLe sEarcH fOr tHe fOunta!n
pRom!sEs aRe fOreveR yOurs
sOme peOpLe nEeD tHe dOzen rOses
anD that’s tHe only wAy yOu prOve yOu lOve tHem

hanD mE tHe wOrLd
On a s!LveR pLatteR
tHen wHat gOod !t wOuLd bE
nO onE tO sHare
nO onE wHo tRuLy cAres fOr mE

sOme peOpLe wAnt !t aLL
bUt ! dOn’t wAnt nOtH!nG at aLL
!f !t a!n’t yOu baby, !f ! a!n’t gOt yOu baby
sOme peOpLe wAnt d!amOnd r!nGs
sOme jUst wAnt eVeRytH!ng
bUt eVeRytH!ng mEans nOtH!ng !f ! a!n’t gOt yOu

sOme peOpLe wAnt !t aLL
bUt ! dOn’t wAnt nOtH!nG at aLL
!f !t a!n’t yOu baby, !f ! a!n’t gOt yOu baby
sOme peOpLe wAnt d!amOnd r!nGs
sOme jUst wAnt eVeRytH!ng
bUt eVeRytH!ng mEans nOtH!ng !f ! a!n’t gOt yOu

!f ! a!n’t gOt yOu w!tH mE baBy
a!n’t nOtH!nG !n tH!s wHoLe w!De wOrLD
dOn’t mEan a tH!nG
!f ! a!n’t gOt yOu w!tH mE baby...

tHougHts.

2005-06-01T13:17:00.000+08:00

Weeks passed...
Things changed and I got used without him in my life...
I’ve met other guys and then I thought...
Do I really still love him and want him back in my life after all the thing he did to me?
Do I want him to be my best friend if I know I can’t even trust him?
Do I really need him?
At first I thought I can’t imagine me without him and that I love him so much that I don’t want him to leave and that I’ll do anything for him to stay...but now...now that I know everything and now that I know who he really is...
I don’t think that I still love him and want him back in my life...
I don’t think that I want him to be my best friend because he’s not the type of person that I can trust and depend on...
I don’t think that I need him for me to be who I am...

When things were going crazy between us during our last months together I thought we can get over it and be happy again but after knowing all the things that he did...it made me think...
Do I still really love him during those times that our relationship was a mess?
Its just now, now that were not together, that I realized that I really didn’t love him during those times...its just that I got so used to it of having him by my side always and having him In my life...
Well, what would you expect...we’ve been together for more than two years and we lived our lives with each other in it each day during those two years and three months... (even though, of course, there are other girls involved)

And so to you “my baby” (ex)...I DON’T WANT YOU BACK!!!

tHe anSweR

2005-06-01T11:48:00.000+08:00

I guess y’all read my first entry...coz you’ve got to read it first for you to understand this...Well, here it goes...

After two year and three months...it ended...

Last last month, the 13th, Wednesday...
Late that night it seemed like something’s wrong...I had this feeling that there’s something going on that I must know. I asked him what was it and he just replied, “Would you be mad if I told you I have another girl?”

*** WHAT?! Who won’t be mad if she finds out that her guy has another girl?!

After reading his message I called him and asked him what the hell was that all about. He said, “I don’t want you anymore, I want someone else!” I asked him, “What happened? What have I done for it to end like this?” but he just told me that he just wants me to go and leave him alone. I didn’t understand why and what was it that made him look for another girl. I did and gave everything that I could but wasn’t it still enough? Where did I go wrong? What was it that I wasn’t able to give him? Then I asked him when it started. He told me its been three days.

*** Wait! Three days? If today’s the 13th and it’s the 3rd day then that means that he’s been flirting with this girl the day after our monthsary.

I don’t understand!!! Why?! We were just having fun and enjoying each others company three days ago...then the day after he just decided to see and be with another girl?! Anyway, so it happened and I can’t do anything to change it. I asked him about his girl and he told me that she’s just like me and that she looks a bit like me. He said he still wants someone who would somewhat look like me. But what hurts is that he wants another girl to be his girl as long as it’s not me.

*** Why would he want someone that looks like me if he doesn’t want me anymore?

I told him I want to see this girl but he won’t let me. I asked him why but he just told me that he doesn’t want this girl to know who and what he really is coz he might lose another girl.

*** Another girl?! What does that mean?! Then I remember him telling me something about him seeing other girls and getting back together with his ex-girlfriend. But while he was telling me that and as I try to ask questions about it, he told me that he was just making it up just for me to leave.

So we talked until 4:30 am in the morning. He told me about his friendster account and said that I should make one too and add him. The next day, I opened his account and as I was reading it I saw this testimonial that his ex-girlfriend made for him. She wrote there that they’ve been going out for more than a month now and that she loves him so much and misses him...blah, blah, blah...so I checked out this girl’s account and saw his testimonial for her which says that this girl is his and that no guy should try to get near her coz he loves her so much and so on...blah, blah, blah...so what would I expect? After reading it I knew there was still something that I should know. I asked him what was that all about and he said that it was nothing. I told him that if it really didn’t mean anything then why would they and why would he say things like that to that girl. He denied everything. So I asked him questions so that he would tell me the truth and finally he gave in. He admitted that both of them got back together last January 18, 8 days after our 2nd anniversary. The girl knew that we were still together and he knew that the girl still has a boyfriend but they still agreed to be together.

*** BITCH!!!

So they’ve been together for almost three months when I knew about it. Well, I guess I just wasn’t enough for him that he needed another girlfriend. I asked him how did it happen and he told me that she was also studying in the same school and that everything just happened. They eat lunch together and he brings her home and stay there ‘til late at night. Just the opposite of what he tells me everyday; that he’s by himself and that he goes home right after his class and that when he gets home he’s too busy taking care of his lil’ bro.

*** LIAR!!! Damn I hate you!!! Busy taking care of your lil’ bro huh?!

Going back to his friendster account...there was another testimonial from another girl saying that he’s so sweet and blah, blah, blah...so I checked this girl’s account and saw a lot of message from him...his first message was last February 14 saying that he’s falling for her even if he knew her for only less than a week. Then the following messages he sent were songs and 1 was a poem that he made for her then others were all messages of him asking for forgiveness and another chance. So I asked him again what it was all about. He asked me if I still remember the story he told me about him meeting and seeing other girls. He told me that that was true and that he didn’t make it up. I asked him what happened to that girl and he told me that she found out that he still has a girlfriend – me. He was about to text me one night but he made a mistake and sent it to this girl. So when they met, the girl asked him what was that ‘baby’ thing all about and he said it was nothing. Unfortunately, the girl was with her friends when they met and one of her friends knew him because they live in the same village and she was also his friend. This girl knew that we were still together. So when she heard about that ‘baby’ thing they were talking about she said, “Baby? Isn’t that _____? She’s still your girlfriend, right? Yeah, I know your still together coz I saw you with her.” But he just denied it and said that I’m not his girlfriend anymore.

*** FUCK YOU!!!

So the girl got mad at him and asked him why he would do that if he still has a girlfriend. In short, he got dumped.

Going back to what I’ve said earlier about him leaving me because he has another girl...he met this girl a month after he got dumped. He met her during their summer class. They were classmates. The day after our monthsary, April 11, Monday, he asked his girl friend if she got the number of this girl and he got lucky. That night they started texting each other and he started to make his move. Things got even better between them when we broke up. And of course the girl didn’t know that he has a girlfriend...and not only one, but two girlfriends – me and his ex-girlfriend bitch! Few days after we broke up we had a fight and it just ended up in him giving me the cell number of this girl for me to tell her who and what he really is. He knew it would end there and that he can’t do a thing for it not to happen after the girl finds out who he really is and that he still has a girlfriend – his ex-girlfriend bitch. And so it happened, the girl stayed away from him an ignored him...and he...he got dumped AGAIN!

After what happened, he started texting me and he became sweet again (and I know its because he has no one to be sweet to so he does it to me) then he told me that he wants us to be best friends and that he’ll come back in time. When I heard him say that it made me feel better knowing that we’ll be together again in time. Damn, coz I still love him...so much...

yOu LoSt

2005-05-30T12:46:00.000+08:00

yOu m!gHt tH!nk tHat !'m sO dAmn !n lOve w!tH yOu
sO !n lOve tHat ! cAn't lEt yOu gO;
yOu m!gHt tH!nk tHat !'m sO dAmn aFra!D tO lOse yOU
sO aFra!D tHat ! wOn't f!nD anOtHer;
yOu m!gHt tH!nk tHat !'m sO dAmn stUp!D
sO stUp!D tHat ! kEep On hOld!nG On;
yOu m!gHt tH!nk abOut aLL tHosE stUffs abOut mE
mAybE yOU'rE r!gHt
jUst tO cLear tH!nGs Out
! mAy bE sO !n lOve, sO aFra!D, anD sO stUp!D
bUt oNe tH!nG's fOr sUre
!'vE lOveD yOu w!tH aLL mY hEart
!'vE lOveD yOU mOre tHan yOu cOuLd !mag!nE
! gAve yOu tHe lOve tHat nO oNe cAn eVer g!vE yOu
! gAve yOu aLL tHat ! cOuLd
! d!D mY bEst
!f yOu'vE gOt a pRobLem w!tH tHat
!ts yOur lOst!!!

***wRitten: mArcH 31, 2005

10 tH!nGs ! hatE abOut yOu

2005-05-30T12:20:00.000+08:00

! hatE tHe wAy yOu caLL mE baBy
anD dOn't eVen mEan !t;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu sAy '! LovE yOu'
w!tHouT be!nG s!ncEre;
! hatE tHe wAy You tReat mE
!t maKes mE fEeL L!ke yOu dOn't caRe;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu pLay jOkes On mE
pRetEnD!ng aS !f !t !sn't tRue;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu k!Ss mE
maK!nG mE fEeL tHat yOu'LL aLwaYs bE heRe;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu hOLd mY hAnD
sO t!gHt L!ke yOu wOn't LeaVe mE;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu !gnOre mE
tH!nk!nG aS !f !'m nOt aRounD;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu kEep tH!nGs frOm mE
!t maKes mE fEeL aBuseD;
! hatE tHe wAy yOu aSk fOr mY tRust
!t sEemS L!ke yOur uP tO sOMetH!ng;
anD mOst Of aLL, ! hatE tHe wAy yOu maDe mE LovE yOu
sO tRue, sO hOneSt tHat ! caN’t Let yOu gO…

***wR!tten: mArcH 31, 2005

uNcLeaR.

2005-05-30T11:42:00.000+08:00

its been two years
two years of love
many came along
fights were full of anger
hate made wrong decisions
both did things to hold on
but there are just people
people who make it worst and harder
but it went on...

the fact can't be denied
fights and trials will always be there
but what happened?
it was all going on well
both were loving their best
then somthing came up...

why did one had to leave?
what is it that the other have done
so bad, that one wanted to leave?
everything was done
the other gave and did everything
sacrificed a lot and yet didn't give up
coz it wasn't the right thing to do
but why did one wanted to go so badly?
after all that was done
nothing was appreciated and understood
the other loved at the best
showed what more could be done
just for that one person would stay...

both promised to be loyal and true
never to hide anything
never to fool around
until one broke the promise
and one day the other knew of it
it was all obvious
but many lies were told
too afraid to admit things
knowing what was done shouldn't be
but still was given a chance
a chance to prove that things like those won't happen again
a chance to convince the other
that there's no one else but both of them alone...

but what happened?
now that the other made a mistake
a simple mistake that needs no fight
yet not given enough chance to prove things
to prove that both of them are meant to be together
madness was always first
there are no reasons to explain
no considerations to take
and sorry's are not accepted...

if only things would be clearer
to make that one person realize
that love has come
a love not just to have someone as a partner
but a love that will always be there
never giving up
standing strong
even often abused and rejected
coz a love like that
should be something
someone must keep...

***wRitten: mArcH 28, 2005